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Monday, 13 February 2012

Sad Story


“When I got home that night as my wife served dinner, I held her hand and said, I’ve got something to tell you. She sat down and ate quietly. Again I observed the hurt in her eyes.


Suddenly I didn’t know how to open my mouth. But I had to let her know what I was thinking. I want a divorce. I raised the topic calmly. She didn’t seem to be annoyed by my words, instead she asked me softly, why?


I avoided her question. This made her angry. She threw away the chopsticks and shouted at me, you are not a man! That night, we didn’t talk to each other. She was weeping. I knew she wanted to find out what had happened to our marriage. But I could hardly give her a satisfactory answer; she had lost my heart to Jane. I didn’t love her anymore. I just pitied her!


With a deep sense of guilt, I drafted a divorce agreement which stated that she could own our house, our car, and 30% stake of my company. She glanced at it and then tore it into pieces. The woman who had spent ten years of her life with me had become a stranger. I felt sorry for her wasted time, resources and energy but I could not take back what I had said for I loved Jane so dearly. Finally she cried loudly in front of me, which was what I had expected to see. To me her cry was actually a kind of release. The idea of divorce which had obsessed me for several weeks seemed to be firmer and clearer now.


The next day, I came back home very late and found her writing something at the table. I didn’t have supper but went straight to sleep and fell asleep very fast because I was tired after an eventful day with Jane. When I woke up, she was still there at the table writing. I just did not care so I turned over and was asleep again.


In the morning she presented her divorce conditions: she didn’t want anything from me, but needed a month’s notice before the divorce. She requested that in that one month we both struggle to live as normal a life as possible. Her reasons were simple: our son had his exams in a month’s time and she didn’t want to disrupt him with our broken marriage.


This was agreeable to me. But she had something more, she asked me to recall how I had carried her into out bridal room on our wedding day. She requested that every day for the month’s duration I carry her out of our bedroom to the front door ever morning. I thought she was going crazy. Just to make our last days together bearable I accepted her odd request.


I told Jane about my wife’s divorce conditions. . She laughed loudly and thought it was absurd. No matter what tricks she applies, she has to face the divorce, she said scornfully.


My wife and I hadn’t had any body contact since my divorce intention was explicitly expressed. So when I carried her out on the first day, we both appeared clumsy. Our son clapped behind us, daddy is holding mommy in his arms. His words brought me a sense of pain. From the bedroom to the sitting room, then to the door, I walked over ten meters with her in my arms. She closed her eyes and said softly; don’t tell our son about the divorce. I nodded, feeling somewhat upset. I put her down outside the door. She went to wait for the bus to work. I drove alone to the office.


On the second day, both of us acted much more easily. She leaned on my chest. I could smell the fragrance of her blouse. I realized that I hadn’t looked at this woman carefully for a long time. I realized she was not young any more. There were fine wrinkles on her face, her hair was graying! Our marriage had taken its toll on her. For a minute I wondered what I had done to her.


On the fourth day, when I lifted her up, I felt a sense of intimacy returning. This was the woman who had given ten years of her life to me. On the fifth and sixth day, I realized that our sense of intimacy was growing again. I didn’t tell Jane about this. It became easier to carry her as the month slipped by. Perhaps the everyday workout made me stronger.


She was choosing what to wear one morning. She tried on quite a few dresses but could not find a suitable one. Then she sighed, all my dresses have grown bigger. I suddenly realized that she had grown so thin, that was the reason why I could carry her more easily.


Suddenly it hit me… she had buried so much pain and bitterness in her heart. Subconsciously I reached out and touched her head.


Our son came in at the moment and said, Dad, it’s time to carry mom out. To him, seeing his father carrying his mother out had become an essential part of his life. My wife gestured to our son to come closer and hugged him tightly. I turned my face away because I was afraid I might change my mind at this last minute. I then held her in my arms, walking from the bedroom, through the sitting room, to the hallway. Her hand surrounded my neck softly and naturally. I held her body tightly; it was just like our wedding day.


But her much lighter weight made me sad. On the last day, when I held her in my arms I could hardly move a step. Our son had gone to school. I held her tightly and said, I hadn’t noticed that our life lacked intimacy. I drove to office…. jumped out of the car swiftly without locking the door. I was afraid any delay would make me change my mind…I walked upstairs. Jane opened the door and I said to her, Sorry, Jane, I do not want the divorce anymore.


She looked at me, astonished, and then touched my forehead. Do you have a fever? She said. I moved her hand off my head. Sorry, Jane, I said, I won’t divorce. My marriage life was boring probably because she and I didn’t value the details of our lives, not because we didn’t love each other anymore. Now I realize that since I carried her into my home on our wedding day I am supposed to hold her until death do us apart. Jane seemed to suddenly wake up. She gave me a loud slap and then slammed the door and burst into tears. I walked downstairs and drove away. At the floral shop on the way, I ordered a bouquet of flowers for my wife. The salesgirl asked me what to write on the card. I smiled and wrote, I’ll carry you out every morning until death do us apart.


That evening I arrived home, flowers in my hands, a smile on my face, I run up stairs, only to find my wife in the bed -dead. My wife had been fighting CANCER for months and I was so busy with Jane to even notice. She knew that she would die soon and she wanted to save me from the whatever negative reaction from our son, in case we push through with the divorce.— At least, in the eyes of our son—- I’m a loving husband….


The small details of your lives are what really matter in a relationship. It is not the mansion, the car, property, the money in the bank. These create an environment conducive for happiness but cannot give happiness in themselves.


So find time to be your spouse’s friend and do those little things for each other that build intimacy. Do have a real happy marriage!


If you don’t share this, nothing will happen to you.


If you do, you just might save a marriage. Many of life’s failures are people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up.

35 comments:

  1. That is so sad.... But st least in the end you realized that you still loved your wife, and that true love never dies.

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  2. I cry :'( that guy.... what he supposed to do?

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  3. Such a sad story - so sorry for your loss. Maybe this sharing of your story will prevent others from making the same mistake.

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  4. this story made me cry~~

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  5. reading this literally broke my heart...

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  6. i can't stop crying..its already 5 hours after i read this.

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  7. i can't stop crying...it's already 5 hours after i read this...

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  8. small thing is worthy..

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  9. I have tear ! so sad and at the same time this things does happen everyday.

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  10. tearsrunning from my eyes. so sad. truely this happen everyday.

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  11. Similar story as my mother. Accept my mother has a rare form of lupus with extreeme food allergies and her body began fighting its self. And her husband DID leave her. She was okay 4 yrs ago when they got married. Within those 4 yrs she was diagnosed with lupus nyphridus along with a severe gluten intolerance she is 6 ft 130 lbs but mow weighs under 100 lbs. In january she was scheduled for a deep tissue biopsy of her theigh muscle. As he had left her a few months prior when she was at her worst so sick she could not walk or eat she and my 13 yr old sister had no one to help her. I took 2 days off work to drive her to her surgery. She was ready to go when bld tests came back that her bld platlet count was so low that if she were to get cut would not clot. Surgery was refused! I took her to her lupus dr for an emergency appointment that day instead. He suggested gluten intolerance tests and to continue the treatment they previously had her on. It is expensive and not covered by insurance and her husband had just left her it was a hard choice because he is a chiropractor and the one supporting their family so she has very lil funds. 3 mo later her bld count is 2 points away frombeing in normal range, she is still very skinny but she has a job, income and their divorve is final. Her dr said if they would have done the surgery there was no doubt she would have died on the table! Yet this man who vowed life, luv and support to my mother left her at the brink of death because he wanted extravegant possesions she said they could not afford. Marriahe is ment to be FOREVER! y do ppl give up so easily nowadays? That in sickness and health means just that not in health and when they get sick just toss them aside!!!

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    Replies
    1. So very sorry for yours and your Moms pain ....thank God you had each other ...God Bless .. Men aren't sensitive souls .

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  12. ~T_T~I'm touched by this story that I cry..

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  13. sometimes people are blinded by LUST rather than remembering the LOVE... LUST seems easier not knowing that LOVE last longer :)

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  14. almost crying....huhu

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  15. Oh my god
    my heart was touching and i am crying -,-

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  16. such a wonderful live sad story.... It is happening in everywhere... The thing is not realize what is happening in our family and how to react with most happiness... Accept everything that makes us happiness that need tolerance of our life... whatever happened in our life is always good...We dont get upset and worried about any such kind of thing.....All goes in a right way....

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  17. I love how strong this woman was and I love that she never told her husband that she was sick. Her strength preserved her son's vision of his father and he'll one day want to be that kind of man too. These are the children that grow up to be good spouses and good people in general. From now on her husband (having to live with what he did) will also strive to be a better person. What a legacy she left behind, we should all be so fortunate.

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  18. I'm sorry for your loss. Your story made me feel so sad

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  19. Super sad story....

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  20. Heart touching story........

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  21. Hi friends, its great paragraph concerning teachingand completely defined, keep it up all the time.
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  22. Such a sad and touching story. It can really move anyone. I pray this would be a reminder to everyone. Not just to people who are married, but to all couple's whose relationships are failing. It's all about Love, not Lust.

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  23. such a sad story and its value for each of to be more appreciate someone

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  24. Damn, this story made me cry, I hope we already learned our lessons in this STORY!

    ~There is a saying that you will only feel the guilt on the last part, however you can still never turn back time~

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  25. This is painful, Bt definitely, there is a lesson we all could learn from it :')

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  26. touching story.. ma heart breaking. T.T

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